Title: Toss, Turn, Tumble
Word Count: 14600
Summary: Scientists say hate is a passion that is of equal interest to love. But that’s definitely not the case when Tumblr ulzzangs-slash-rivals wrldflwrboi and man-han meet each other in real life.
Other Pairings: Baekhyun/Chen, mentions of Sehun/Tao
As Jongdae pushes him off of his computer chair, dragging him by the wrist to get him to move out of his room even faster, Sehun can’t help but wonder how much luck he’ll really need to survive this.
Sehun soon finds out that he’s really going to need a fuckton of luck because, apparently, Baekhyun’s roommate turns out to be Lu—tumblr user man-han, who is just about the last person Sehun ever wants to meet in real life.
“I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU WOULD BETRAY MY TRUST LIKE THIS, HYUNG. HOW CAN YOU DO THIS TO ME. I THOUGHT—”
Jongdae immediately places his hand over Sehun’s mouth and grimaces. It's only been a few seconds since they stepped inside the coffee shop and, already, Jongdae's starting to regret his decision of listening to Baekhyun's idea and bringing Sehun along as his plus one for their date today. It's not like Jongdae never considered the odds of eliciting this kind of reaction from Sehun — in retrospect, he had, just by judging how reluctant Sehun was to even mention Luhan's name earlier. But experiencing it firsthand is an entirely different story altogether and Jongdae just feels like digging a huge hole somewhere and burying himself there just so he can escape all this unwanted attention thrown at them.
Sehun, on the other hand, is busy trying to remove Jongdae's hand from his mouth to even notice his distress. Not even budging from Sehun's attempts to escape, it's pretty obvious that Jongdae's quite persistent to treat him like a little, unruly kid, so Sehun makes sure to retaliate like how one would — he lets his tongue slip past his lips and swipes it across Jongdae's palm, does it a few more times until Jongdae is left with no other choice but to finally take his hand back so he can wipe the drool off his skin.
Jongdae proceeds to scowl at him in disgust. Sehun scowls back for an entirely different reason.
It’s Baekhyun suddenly clearing his throat that has both of them snapping their heads to the nearest table on their left. There’s a weird expression written all over his face and Sehun’s not sure if that’s supposed to be amusement or exasperation towards the scene unfolding in front of him. Or maybe a little bit of both.
“Well, don’t just stand there. Sit down,” Baekhyun orders.
Jongdae frantically plants his ass on one of the two seats available and Sehun would’ve giggled out loud at how quick Jongdae was to obey if only he could actually get himself to. But seeing as how the only seat left for him to take was the one directly across from the person he never really wanted to socialize with, it was with no surprise that Sehun couldn’t really find amusement in all of this anymore.
“Don’t want to,” Sehun stubbornly says. It probably wouldn’t do him good to have his rival see how immature he can actually be in real life but Sehun could care less, really. He just wants to go home now and bury himself in his fluffy bedsheets and spend all of his time on Tumblr.
“Sehun,” Baekhyun says once again and no one can miss the underlying warning in his voice even if they try to. Sehun gulps.
Despite every living cell in his body telling him to just bolt and never look back, Sehun grumbles and begrudgingly takes the seat next to Baekhyun. From the corner of his eye, he sees Jongdae roll his eyes — probably at his childishness again — so Sehun makes sure to retaliate by kicking him hard under the table. Sehun victoriously whoops inside his head when he sees Jongdae’s face immediately twist in pain.
Baekhyun clucks his tongue at them disapprovingly before eventually turning his attention on Sehun and Luhan. “I’m pretty sure you two already know each other well so I suppose we can skip the introductions?”
None of them answers. There’s a stream of awkward silence drifting between them and the almost palpable tension is only making Sehun’s skin prickle. Sehun chances a slight glimpse at Luhan sitting beside Baekhyun, only to find him already looking at his direction, a contemplative look on his face. Immediately, Sehun bows his head down and feels a sudden loathing for himself for the warmth pooling in his cheeks. It’s ridiculous, and Sehun doesn’t think he has any reason to feel so self-conscious like this.
But, the thing is, he actually does, and Sehun can’t exactly find the reason why.
Jongdae ends up ordering for all four of them and it doesn’t take long before he arrives with their drinks. Sehun gets his usual tall cup of green tea latte — which is really more than enough to momentarily distract him from his thoughts — while Luhan orders an espresso for himself. The smell of his coffee wafts through the air and just the idea of drinking something so bitter makes Sehun unconsciously grimace.
“So,” Baekhyun starts after taking a sip of his caramel macchiato, “don’t you have anything you want to tell him, Lu? Weren’t you dying to meet Sehun in person?”
Sehun starts at that. He isn’t sure what to feel — surprised, maybe, and a lot more confused because never once had Sehun considered that Luhan might want to know him, much less talk to him. But here he is today, just a seat across from Luhan, and Sehun bravely fixes a firm stare at him despite himself.
“I’m thrilled to have finally met you, Sehun,” Luhan says. There’s a sickeningly sweet smile dancing on his lips and Sehun feels wary for the first time today, doesn’t really know what to make of it. He unconsciously braces himself. “Although, I must say I wasn’t expecting you to look a lot pastier in person. You’re honestly much better looking in pictures.”
It takes a few seconds before the words start to settle and when they finally did, Sehun makes sure to keep a straight face, looking entirely indifferent and unaffected. In reality, though, he’s shocked and very much annoyed. On his side, Sehun vaguely sees Baekhyun just shaking his head.
“I should take that as a compliment coming from you, I guess. You, on the other hand…” Sehun stops, furrowing his eyebrows in concentration and pretending like he’s trying to gather his thoughts. “It must’ve been hard for you before, huh?”
Luhan raises an eyebrow at him. “What do you mean?”
“I just—I can’t imagine how much it had cost you but I guess your family must be pretty rich to have your nose fixed like that.”
Sehun lets a victorious smirk lift the corners of his mouth after that. There’s a rather unattractive snort that reaches his ears soon after and Sehun’s positively sure that it came from Jongdae — he’s always been a lot more proficient when it comes to being rude than Baekhyun.
Luhan frowns and quickly reaches up to cover his nose with one hand. He looks ridiculous, especially with that pout on his face, and Sehun just really, really wants to laugh at him now. “I’ll have you know this is 100% natural—”
“How about your jaw, then?” Sehun rudely interjects, now completely unable to stop himself from talking. “How many weeks did you need to recover from having that reconstructed?”
“Aren’t you being too disrespectful? I’m a lot older than you, you know. Or have you let your popularity go to your head too much that you can’t even find your manners now?”
Well, that was a low blow. Sehun grits his teeth, fists tightly balled under the table.
“Being famous on any social platform doesn’t have anything to do with it. Respect should be earned, hyung, and I don’t think you’re in the place to ask that from me.”
“I was merely trying to—”
“OKAY, YOU TWO, BREAK IT UP!” Jongdae yells, his loud voice immediately causing the two to stop bickering. It’s probably not healthy to have too much attention drawn to them in just a few measly hours but the situation they currently have at hand is certainly calling for just that.
Baekhyun tsks. This impromptu meeting is turning out to be an even Bigger Disaster than he’d originally thought it would. “Starting a fight on your very first meeting already? I thought only grade school kids flirt like this.”
Both heads turn to him at the same time, eyes wide and disbelieving.
“Flirting? With him? Hyung, I’d rather die than—”
“Shut up, Baekhyun! You don’t know what you’re talki—”
Baekhyun slants a “duh” look at them to stop them both from talking. “The sexual frustration between you two is practically stifling; with the way you’re trying to bite each other’s heads off in the middle of a very nice afternoon.”
Sehun can’t quite believe what he’s hearing. He’s pretty sure the only things he’s feeling right now are boiling rage and pure dislike for Luhan. Nope, no sexual frustration whatsoever.
“But this progress is good,” Baekhyun says, grinning. For someone who was in the middle of a silly argument just a second ago, Baekhyun sounds so shockingly pleased. “They say hate is a passion that is of equal interest to love, or some shit like that. And I see how that can be true in this situation.”
Sehun thinks he can see it, too. Oh, how he would absolutely love to punch that guy with the pretty face sitting across from him.
“I guess it’s only a matter of time now~” Baekhyun annoyingly singsongs. He’s completely aware that Sehun is beyond seething right now, yet still makes it a point to rile him up even more.
Only a matter of time now before Sehun punches Baekhyun in the face, too. Yep.
Anonymous asked you: How did the date go? Details!
urfavoritenoona asked you: very handsome :( follow back please?
bloodofvirgins asked you: are you single? if yes, can you be my boyfriend 8)
Anonymous asked you: hey gay boy
Anonymous asked you: didn’t know u had a date!! with who?????
Anonymous asked you: get yo ass out of tumblr u fag
Sehun sighs, tiredly pressing the tiny x over each message in his askbox. He’s still getting asks about that poor excuse of a date he’d went to even though it had been almost close to a week now since it happened and, frankly, it’s starting to get on Sehun’s nerves. Posting a picture of his straight face with the caption “could’ve spent my time better here with you guys :c” that same day after getting home from his disastrous da—meeting was probably a wrong move, too.
“We’re given free time to use Tumblr now?” Jongin asks as soon as he plops down beside Sehun. He’s munching loudly on some chips and Sehun doesn’t really have it in himself to remind Jongin again that eating inside the computer laboratory isn’t allowed.
“Nope,” Sehun simply says. Don’t wanna do work, is left unsaid but Jongin still gets it nonetheless.
They’re supposed to be working on creating their own website today, designing and coding the whole thing by themselves for the basis of their midterm grade. And while Sehun is a little knowledgeable when it comes to this kind of stuff, Jongin is basically his complete opposite so it’s actually mind-boggling why he’d let Jongin trick him into working together for this project.
But, whatever; Sehun supposes there’s no one else in the room he’d rather be partners with other than his best friend, anyway.
There isn’t much Sehun can do to occupy himself while he waits for class to be over. He clicks over his dashboard, eyes quickly roving over the things he can reblog. Nothing quite catches his attention, though, so Sehun is left refreshing his dashboard a few more times until he eventually gets bored.
“So a little birdie told me something interesting yesterday,” Jongin tells him. He already finished his pack of chips and is now in the process of licking the powdered cheese off his fingers. It’s disgusting and very much unsanitary so Sehun grabs a pack of tissues from his bag and throws it at Jongin.
“Does this little birdie go by the name of Jongdae.” Sehun replies flatly, not even bothering to make it sound like a proper question.
Jongin stops in the middle of wiping his ring finger off and looks at Sehun. “…Maybe.” Sehun rolls his eyes. “So, anyway, how did it feel to finally meet someone of your own kind?”
It’s a very weird question, one that Sehun doesn’t acknowledge with an answer because: one, he’s not even sure how he can respond to something like that and; two, he doesn’t really feel like relieving that terrible encounter with Luhan, not when just uttering his name in his head already makes Sehun frown in annoyance.
Sehun shrugs, eyes still trained on the computer screen. “I’m sure Jongdae hyung already told you what happened.”
“He did, which is really weird…” A deep furrow forms in Jongin’s eyebrows. “Luhan hyung doesn’t seem like that bad of a guy when Chanyeol hyung and I met him the other day.”
Sehun turns his head to the left so fast it almost caused him a whiplash. “What? Why? I mean—how did you guys meet?”
“Met him at a street dance last night. Remember the one I told you about weeks ago?” Jongin asks.
“Yeah,” Sehun distractedly says. Of course he remembers because, really, there’s no way he can easily forget the excitement shining in Jongin’s eyes when he was telling Sehun all about it before. And, even after weeks of turning his invitation down, citing some kind of excuse that he’d stopped dancing because juggling his studies and his part-time job as a cashier at a fast food chain is already too much work, Sehun still can’t quite shut Jongin’s disappointed look out of his mind.
“Hey, did you know that he dances, too?” Jongin continues to gush at him. There’s that thrill dancing in his eyes again, the same one that Jongin only really gets when he’s talking about something he’s really passionate about. Sehun realizes he hasn’t seen it for months. Until now. “He was really good! A bit different from our usual genre, I guess, but that’s not bad, right? Maybe we should—”
Sehun immediately tunes Jongin out as soon as he starts blabbering about something that involves the three of them. There’s a little nagging voice at the back of his head that Sehun can’t quite ignore and, no matter what he tries to tell himself, he can’t stop entertaining the same ridiculous thoughts over and over again.
No one’s going to take his best friend away from him, Sehun knows that, but why does it still feel like Luhan’s out to do just that?
Sehun chews on his bottom lip. That first meeting was a really bad idea and, now, Sehun has found yet another reason to hate Luhan.
The bell suddenly rings, pulling Sehun away from his thoughts, and before Jongin can even hold on to his wrist, invite Sehun out to eat lunch with him and Chanyeol, Sehun’s already out of his chair and just a step away from getting out the door.
sorry for freaking out on you like that man, Sehun tells Jongin that night before going to bed. He’s still feeling a little guilty for leaving Jongin just like that and for practically avoiding him the entire day. He didn’t do anything wrong and, obviously, didn’t deserve to be treated like that.
It’s only a few seconds before his phone beeps, a notification for a new message, and Sehun smiles. s’ok, the text reads, not gonna ask what it was all about but i hope ur feeling better now?
yeah c: why are you so niceeee ugh now im feeling like an ass all over again for acting so silly earlier
dun worry, ur a cute ass. def a cuter ass than luhan hyung~~
Sehun can’t help but giggle under his breath. Sometimes, it’s really damn weird that Jongin knows exactly how to make him feel better. fuck you don’t even try and pull my leg, he sends back.
cackles luv you too man xoxo
The small smile immediately drops off of Sehun’s face as soon as he hands the order to their last customer. It’s nowhere even near closing time yet but, already, Sehun is feeling the tendrils of exhaustion slowly creeping in. Lunch hour is usually the busiest time of their day, though, so Sehun does his best not to fall asleep on his feet.
“You can take your half hour break now, kiddo,” Kris says, tapping his shoulder.
Sehun can’t help but grimace at the new nickname. He doesn’t really know how Kris can find different names to call him every day and it makes him shudder to even consider the idea that it’s probably Kris’s favorite thing to do lately. Usually, Sehun would respond by either sticking his tongue out at him or calling him an even weirder name, but since he’s had a fairly nice morning — no annoying customers so far — Sehun just decides to let Kris slide today.
He heads straight to the employees’ lounge room, grabs the food he’d prepare this morning from his bag and proceeds to settle comfortably on one of the unoccupied sofa seats inside. It doesn’t even take Sehun a second too long before he’s taking his phone out and logging in on his Tumblr account.
one of ur selcas is on fuckyeahuhljjang again! is the latest message Sehun sees in his askbox. Almost immediately, it brings a bright smile on his face and he quickly thumbs through his phone to see what picture of him they’ve reposted this time.
As it turns out, the selca is actually one of his older ones — it’s a picture of him posing in front of a mirror, a hand steadily holding his phone camera. Sehun remembers how many shots it had took him before he was finally satisfied with the outcome, how excited he had been to find a lot of people liking it as much as he did. It feels like a long time ago since he’d taken that picture and Sehun unconsciously reaches up and touches his blond fringe. God, he suddenly misses his black hair.
Sehun spends his break browsing through page after page of pictures on fuckyeahuhljjang while munching on his sandwich. He curiously digs around and sees a bunch of damn attractive people with their shy smiles and nice clothes, faces bare and a few others enhanced by make-up. It really shouldn’t be a big deal that Sehun’s seeing his face up there again but the giddy feeling blooming in chest says otherwise. Before Sehun knows it, his lunch break is already over, half an hour wasted on Tumblr yet again.
He quickly stashes his phone away and steps out of the employees’ lounge room, only to freeze halfway through as soon as he sees the next customer in line. Sehun briefly considers turning around and walking back to the lounge but before he can actually work on that thought, Kris spots him from his place behind the counter and tells Sehun to take the next order.
Ugh. There is no way in hell this is actually happening. Sehun wonders when his luck had started to run out.
Sehun tries not to let the varying levels of annoyance show on his face as he takes his place behind the cash register. Luhan, on the other hand, is apparently enjoying every ticking second of this encounter, if the taunting smirk on his lips — at Sehun’s uneasiness, no doubt — is anything to go by.
“May I take your order?” Sehun asks, his voice thankfully void of all the murderous feelings he’s struggling with at this very moment.
Luhan stands in front of him, still grinning, and Sehun has to persistently remind himself about professionalism and treating the customers right and all that shit so he won’t accidentally punch Luhan in the face or something.
“Two burgers with regular fries and drinks, please,” Luhan sweetly says. He then turns to his companion and, almost immediately, the expression on his face shifts entirely — there’s a kind of gentleness that curls around the edges of his smile now that Sehun can’t quite describe. “Did you want anything else, Minseok?”
The guy — Minseok — only shakes his head. “You sure?” Luhan asks again.
The next fifteen seconds of Sehun’s work life is spent watching Luhan try to get another answer from Minseok other than “it’s fine” and “it’s really okay, I don’t want anything else” and if looks could really kill, the glare that Sehun has been surreptitiously throwing at them might, quite possibly, really bring them to their early deaths.
God, he’s not getting paid enough for this.
“Luhan, I’m fine,” Minseok assures him for the third (fourth? fifth? tenth?) time, laughing softly. “Hurry up, will you? We’re holding up the line!”
Luhan turns to him again, uttering “that would be all then”, and Sehun makes the mistake of punching their orders in too hard that Minseok ends up looking at him weirdly. Sehun just ignores him and quickly steps away to fulfill their orders before he can do something rash again.
Sehun finishes assembling their order in record time because: one, the line is getting too long now and Sehun can see the other customers already throwing him the stink eye (this is really not his fault, though) and; two, he just really, really wants Luhan out of his sight.
Sehun hands Luhan their order while forcing the corners of his mouth to tug upwards. “Please enjoy your meal.”
(And if Luhan had responded with a “I certainly will” under his breath before finally leaving, Sehun wouldn’t have noticed because he was already too busy attending to his next customer then, the man stepping forward and frantically rattling off his orders to Sehun one by one.)
That night, Sehun catches himself aimlessly clicking random links on his dashboard until he ends up browsing through fuckyeahuhljjang again. His picture has gained a few more notes ever since he saw it this afternoon at work and Sehun really couldn’t be happier, the thought of posting another selca as a little appreciation gift to everyone briefly passing through his mind.
Just as Sehun is about to close Tumblr to prepare for his new selca, he realizes there’s a bunch of other new pictures posted on the first page that he’d never seen earlier. He goes through them, just driven by mere curiosity, and stops at particular one that had caught his attention because of one reason alone.
He’s staring at Luhan’s recent picture and seeing his face has Sehun feeling a lot of things all at once.
Judging by the bed captured in the background, Sehun can only assume that Luhan took it inside his bedroom. He’s holding a burger while posing for the camera, a smile still prominent on his lips even as he’s about to take a bite of his food. It’s the same burger Luhan had bought earlier, Sehun realizes as he notices the timestamp, and it’s really ridiculous how that fact alone is enough to make Sehun grit his teeth in annoyance.
It’s just a mere burger, sure, but it’s the same one he’d handed to Luhan this afternoon, the very same food item that he had to quickly prepare just to make him go away, and the thought just really irritates him to no end. Sehun, basically, just really doesn’t want anything to do with Luhan. Even by extension of a measly burger.
Even in his annoyance, Sehun doesn’t miss the number of notes on the post; it read 438, exactly a hundred and fifty reblogs and likes more than his own.
Well, isn’t that just great?
Sehun exits Tumblr just as quickly as he’d logged in, not in the mood anymore to take that selca. He’s probably going to have to find out how to exit this life as well if Luhan keeps on making his very much unwanted presence known in everything Sehun does.
Luhan is horrendously everywhere.
Sehun’s not entirely sure when it started or how it even happened without him noticing it. But then one day, he’s suddenly catching Luhan’s name in the list of friends that Jongdae wants to invite over for his birthday. He’s suddenly spotting Luhan dancing next to Jongin in some of the dance tutorial videos that Jongin uploads on his Youtube account. He’s suddenly spotting Kris being all chummy with Luhan at work because, apparently, he’s been going to the fast food chain often enough that Kris has taken to calling him his favorite customer. He’s suddenly looking at Luhan’s face on the very top of the first page every single time Sehun accidentally clicks on fuckyeahuhljjang’s Tumblog.
But the worst thing of all is seeing Luhan’s name all over his Tumblr account, his askbox slowly getting infiltrated by questions and weird comparisons people are making between him and Luhan, how surprisingly nice it is that two Tumblr famous ulzzangs look a lot like each other in some angles.
(They absolutely don’t. Sehun vehemently refuses to acknowledge that observation.)
Luhan’s probably not, in any way, meaning to do it, but he’s beginning to make his mark on Sehun’s life as well, worming his way under Sehun’s skin because there’s no way in hell Sehun would consciously just allow Luhan like that. Luhan’s easily associating himself to everything he loves and knows and it makes Sehun feel a little uneasy just thinking about it.
The idea is just all kinds of absurd, but Sehun wonders if this is just the universe’s way of playing tricks on him, fate trying to mock him by making everyone he knows adore Luhan like he’s a great person, see Luhan as a complete opposite of what Sehun has conjured up about him in his mind.
Sehun scoffs. It sounds like this fictional thing that Sehun had always read in stories online. Well. Fate, or whatever fantasy stuff is responsible for this, can just suck it; no way is Sehun just easily going to fall for this kind of trap.